What Happens (To Your Work) When You Die?

When you are self-employed, or have a small business, the matter of your own death is a bit more complex than if you are an employee.

DeathofBusinessFor instance, if you are a health practitioner, or a professional who has clients, what would happen to them if you die suddenly?  Or even die less suddenly?

Do you have a plan in place for who would look after your clients, or take them on?  This may not be so important if you are a hairdresser, or a joiner, but if you are in the healing professions, it really does need to be taken care of.

As an ex-counsellor and psychotherapist, I had a supervisor who knew she would be contacted by my clients if I died. This was professional behavior – in this field, the sudden departure of an important person in one’s life can have far-reaching effects.

The same might be true for a professional dealing with the healing of someone’s body. To be left high and dry if your practitioner dies is not pleasant. Knowing that your practitioner had a plan in place should this happen, including a recommended person to contact, will help your client in any transition that might need to happen.

Other points to consider when thinking of your succession plan (as it is known) are:

  • Be clear about your intentions with the business for after you die
  • Do you want the business to continue after you die? If so, how, and with whom at the helm?
  • Who do you want to have access to any business bank accounts?
  • Who gets to pay any employees, and how should they be paid?
  • How will professional bodies be informed?
  • What about leases on premises?
  • What about insuring against yourself dying, if you are the sole proprietor or key to the business?

The more you prepare in advance, the easier it will be for those left behind if you do die.

In Gifted By Grief, I wrote about The List – questions that I asked Philip a few months before he died. Difficult questions, such as ‘what do you want to be buried in?’ and ‘when should I sell the car?’ and ‘what kind of coffin do you want?’ Not to mention making sure I had his passwords and user names.

This, and the purely business-related questions above, are vital to limit the distress for your loved ones. They will be upset enough about you popping your clogs, without having to make decisions that could have been taken beforehand.

The List is something that many people agree is a good idea to do – but not that many actually DO anything about it. Or they do it, but only a bit of it.  If you’re interested in joining a group focused on helping you complete these kind of questions, email me and express your interest.

There’s no doubt it’s easier in the company of others doing the same thing. So email me now and I’ll get back to you asap.

My new book Gifted By Grief is out NOW!

Gifted By Grief is finally out! here I am with Robert Holden (who wrote the wonderful foreword):
And here is a doodle of what I feel like doing – standing on the top of a high mountain, telling the whole world about it!

You are getting to hear about it first, as you’re on my mailing list.

(What you also need to know is that next week on 8/9/10th September, the e-book version will be FREE!  This is because I really want to get it out to as many people as possible. (I will send out a reminder re this).But it’s for sale right now, e-book and paperback, so if you can’t wait to take a peek, visit here!

You know, death and dying have never had good press, although that is beginning to change, but grief is lagging behind. That’s a large part of the motivation behind this book – to invite people into my life while it was going on. I hope it will help people become more comfortable with grief, whether they are experiencing it themselves or affected by someone else going through it.

It’s a hugely personal book, and yet oddly, I feel somehow detached from it. Like I just have to serve it.  It’s as if this book has a life of it’s own, and all I have to do is obey it’s instructions. Right now, that’s get this book out to as many people as possible. So that’s what I’m doing 🙂

Please join me by passing on this link to anyone else you know: https://janedr.leadpages.co/gbg-sales-page/

Thank you!

You Cannot Capture Silence, It Captures You

For me, the two correctives of all spirituality are silence and service. If either of those is missing, it is not true, healthy spirituality.

Without silence, we do not really experience our experiences. We may serve others and have many experiences, but without silence, nothing has the power to change us, to awaken us, to give us that joy that the world cannot give. And without clear acts of free service a person’s spiritual authenticity can be called into question. Divine Love always needs to and must overflow!

To live in this primordial, foundational being itself, which I am calling silence, creates a kind of sympathetic resonance with what is right in front of us. Without it, we just react instead of respond. Without some degree of silence, we are never living, never tasting, as there is not much capacity to enjoy, appreciate, or taste the moment as it purely is. The opposite of contemplation is not action, it is reaction. We must wait for pure action, which always proceeds from a contemplative silence in which we are able to listen anew to truth and to what is really happening. Such spiritual silence demands a deep presence to oneself in the moment, which will probably have the same practical effect as presence to God.

You do not hear silence (precisely!), but it is that by which you do hear. You cannot capture silence. It captures you. Silence is a kind of thinking that is not thinking. It’s a kind of thinking which mostly sees.

Silence, then, is an alternative consciousness. It is a form of intelligence, a form of knowing beyond bodily reacting or emotion. It is a form of knowing beyond mental analysis, which is what we usually call thinking.

All of the great world religions at the higher levels (mystical) discovered that our tyrannical mode of everyday thinking (which is largely compulsive, brain-driven, and based on early patterning and conditioning) has to be relativized and limited, or it takes over, to the loss of our primal being and identity in ourselves. I used to think that mysticism was the eventual fruit of years of contemplation; now I think it all begins with one clear moment of mystic consciousness, which then becomes the constant “spring inside us, welling up unto eternal life”.

by Richard Rohr

About the Author: Richard Rohr is a Franciscan friar, an internationally known speaker and author, and a founding director of the Center for Action and Contemplation. The above passage is from his book ‘Silent Compassion: Finding God in Contemplation’.

Want To Stand Out? Here’s A Unique Way…

‘Walk slowly amongst the crowd so you stand out’.

These words were heard from an inner voice that is constantly there when this body called Jane goes slowly enough to hear it. They were part of a much longer message I took down some months ago, and as I’m on the island of Erraid being forced to slow down by illness, I thought I’d share them.

The message is the opposite of what is thought by us humans, who believe that to stand out you need to be at the top of your profession, become a celebrity, have plenty of money, be inordinately successful at something, be outrageous in some way, or just be different.

But in fact all of that is the wrong way round. In a world where rushing is the norm, and where the 3rd world is desperate to catch up with the 1st world, the only answer, the sole answer, is to slow down.

Slow …… down…..

Yes, just do that right now, while reading this.  Watch what happens. (And if you don’t slow down, or even stop, then that’s OK!  But if you do, just notice what happens to your breathing, your attention, and how you feel from the inside out. You may be surprised).

One very, very simple way of slowing down is with your walking. The natural movement of the body. Begin to notice what it feels like to walk, to place your foot in front of another. To feel the earth beneath your feet. To breathe in as you place one foot down, to breath out as you place the other.

Begin to notice how others’ walk.  How their bodies are being held.  Whether they are in contact with the earth, or appearing to float above it in some way.  Notice the energetic tension that appears as people rush, hurry and speed from one thing to the next.

Notice it in yourself too. And choose today to bring a momentary gap into that rushing.

A moment when you simply stop.

Do it right now. Yes. When you consciously choose this, you are returning home in that moment.  Actually, you have never left, but you think you have, hence the rushing to get somewhere. The irony is you only get there when you stop going wherever you think you are going.

So stop long enough to look and see that where you want to be, you already are.

Here. Right now. Right here. Present in Presence itself.

Are You in the Dark About Your Business?

In the north of Scotland in the depths of wintertime, it is dark by 4pm, and not properly light again until after 8am. Many people find this a challenge, but it is of course compensated for by very long summer evenings, when the sun rises about 3am, and doesn’t really set until about 11pm. I reorganise my schedule during the winter so I can easily get out in the daytime. This applies to businesses too, so how much time do you spend in the daylight and night time of your business? Continue reading