But it’ s a lot to do with mine, because my husband has just been diagnosed with stomach cancer. Fortunately caught relatively early, and it’ s treatable, but still, a very serious life threatening illness. Talk about an opportunity to think rich! (Ironic laugh from me here).
Needless to say when we first heard this news, thinking rich didn’ t come into it. Shock was the prevalent feeling, for both of us. And then anxiety and a whole range of other emotions, for me primarily anger, actually not just anger but rage, for all kinds of reasons. In fact I’ ve spent quite a time this week connecting with all sorts of different parts of myself that have been activated by this news; a bit of a rollercoaster ride.
However when the reality began to sink in, and I began to accept that this was happening, I also began to think about what could be the rich thinking way to view this situation. Here’ s the result of my ponderings:
- It’ s made me realise my priorities (ie health comes before anything else)
- I have been on the receiving end of a lot of love and support
- I’ ve allowed all the feelings to be there fully, instead of suppressing them which I might well have done years before
- I’ ve had more frank conversations with my husband than we’ ve had for a while
- I’ m incredibly grateful for the community of people we know and live with, who are so supportive in very practical as well as emotional ways.
No doubt there will be some more, at least I hope so!
The point of my telling you this is to highlight the importance of thinking rich in any given situation – why? Because it frees you from the negative emotions associated with any event that you don’ t like for whatever reason. And when that happens, you can make better decisions; you can hear what your heart is trying to tell you; and you can find a place of peace inside, even in the midst of turmoil on the outside. Sounds almost impossible that last one, but I’ ve had good practice over the last year in relation to financial challenges, and here I am again able to find a sense of peace,even when we are in the middle of a ‘ storm.’ Not always – but often.
So when you are next faced with a challenge of some kind, of any nature, here’ s what I’ ve learnt that you might find useful:
- Allow yourself the full range of emotions you are feeling
- Back off from judging them, either negatively or positively – just observe they are visiting
- Be willing to reach out for help and support
- Stop and be still before you act
- Remember to connect with the essence of life and who you are
In fact, you might be able to respond as my husband has chosen to respond to his cancer. He was talking to one of our friends just the other day about it:
“ I don’ t like all this talk about winning the battle with cancer, and fighting it, ‘ he said. ‘ It feels all wrong to me. I would rather treat it as a welcome guest and listen to the message it is bringing me.’
His friend said: ‘ And the thing about guests is that they always leave’ .
And it’ s true. If you can welcome your emotion in fully, you can also ask it to leave fully, once you have heard the message it is bringing you. This is a very courageous thing to do, as it means being willing to be in the midst of whatever the feeling is in the moment, and trusting that it will pass through you and go on it’ s way. This can be scary because, as with all feelings, it’ s easy to think it is always going to be there. We think that about the feelings we like too! But there is a piece of knowledge about feelings that has stood me in good stead over all these years, and here it is: The one thing you can say for sure about feelings is that they always change. Nothing stays the same for ever.
Many blessings to you, and thank you for all the words of healing, love and support we have been