Why Love is Absolutely Central to your Work

‘But I just can’t do it!’ wailed my client, covering her face with her hands.

for stop hiding

‘That’s OK. Let’s wait and see what happens’, I responded gently.

‘I can’t!’ she almost shouted at me, ‘If I wait then nothing will happen and I won’t get any work and then what will I do?’ A tear trickled down her cheek.

‘OK. Let’s just breathe together then,’ I said quietly. A few muffled sounds later and we were sitting together (over Skype) simply being aware of our breathing. I had tailored my breathing to be in sync with hers as much as I could, and it was helping to bring her to a calmer place. This was waiting happening.

She opened her eyes. ‘Oh dear. I get so taken over with fear, and then that makes me panic even more’.

I looked at her directly, ‘Well spotted. So right now, what’s happening in your body? What do you feel, and where?’

Sometimes with my clients I have a session which shifts everything. I often refer back to it as The Conversation – where everything shifts and we start working on a whole different level, with correspondingly different results.

This was one of these times: my client was able to come to a place where she did wait, and something did happen that propelled her into very different actions from what she might otherwise have done.

During the session, I asked her one very important question and when we discussed her answers in depth, everything shifted for her.

So what was actually going on here?

The effects of a difficult divorce were proving hard to bear for her. The receiving of the final decree nisi had impacted her to the extent that she was finding it almost impossible to work.   I was encouraging her to do nothing because I knew that actions taken from a place of fear like this would lead to less than brilliant results.

But the mind hates ‘doing nothing’. It is the part of you that comes up with fabulous ideas to solve your problems. That says ‘you must sign up for that course that tells you what to do’, or ‘you’d better get a job’, or ‘you’ll never be any good, what ever made you think you could do this?’

That’s because the mind is interested purely (and understandably) in your survival. Mind will ‘tell’ you what to do based on your experiences in the past. Mind’s limited thinking, and what it thinks will prompt you to go for what works best, regardless of your intuition. Mind wants to protect you so will do all it can to ensure that.

There’s nothing wrong with this other than it can keep you very stuck. That’s what was happening with my client in that moment. Fortunately, over time, she was able to acknowledge and express her feelings about it (key for movement and shifts to happen).

The only real problem was that she was believing what her mind was saying in that moment, and when you believe anything your mind says (even the good stuff!) then you’re in trouble.
That’s because Love is the only place that can really help you take actions that will work for you. Love, the utter essence of life itself, in all its manifest forms, is the only thing that really matters.

GeneralThis is a big topic and I’m sure to come back to it time and time again, but it’s showing up this week because of my reflections about life and death in my book, Gifted By Grief (which was launched last week, in case you hadn’t heard! You can read more about it here).

When you contemplate life, death is right in there. When you contemplate both of them, love cannot be anything but present (whether you pay any attention to it or not).

Love is always present, let’s face it, but often we ignore it, don’t recognize it, don’t understand this is the case, interfere with it expressing itself – you name it, we have many, many ways of disregarding love.

In business, and in work, love is present too. And one way you can access it is by doing what my client was willing to do: take a conscious breath, and then wait.

Then in that space, you can ask yourself a really important question. This is the one question that shifted everything for my client in the session.

“What does Love want to do now?”

If you’re open and willing, you’ll ‘hear’ a response. It might not come immediately, it may be a hunch or gut feeling, or just an idea that pops into your head. But if it feels right, and is nurturing both for yourself and others, then that will be Love speaking.

And all that needs to then happen is responding to that answer. A lot easier said than done, and I’ll cover that next week!

In the meantime, if you’d like support to access your own loving wisdom in relation to your work, or life for that matter, join me for what I’m now calling The Conversation.

It’s half an hour for free with me, one to one, where you can bring anything you like that is bothering you.

It could be that you know there is a conversation with yourself you’re not having; it could be you know you’re avoiding something in your business; it could be the results you want are not happening in the way you want.

Together we’ll wait and see what happens. Trust me, when you do this in the presence of Love, something will!

I have just 5 slots available to be taken before the end of September so sign up here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Work Less, You’ll Get More Done. Honestly!

‘I’ll never get it all done in time!’ The words of someone under stress, harried and flustered. Very common, in all walks of life, not just work. It seems that the word ‘stress’ as in ‘I’m so stressed’ and ‘It’s so stressful’ have become a normal way of speaking and thinking. But what to do if you agree with these statements? Is it really possible to be less stressed AND get more done?

I know that it is, because it has happened for me. Since my husband’s death, which stopped me completely in my tracks, I was forced to find another way to work. I had no choice.

Hopefully you won’t be in that situation. Hopefully you won’t have to wait until a major life circumstance hits and you are forced to make changes.  Here’s 3 tips on how to do less but get more done.

  1. Stop thinking that stress is the problem.

Yes you may very well be facing difficult circumstances. It’s how you meet those that make them more or less stressful though.

Stress is just another word to which we have given too much power. You can lessen it’s power by remembering that how stressed you feel is actually down to how you meet your circumstances.  This is a turnaround, and definitely one of the attributes of Wild Wisdom!  So it’s not that there’s a stressful situation out there – situations are just what they are. Some are more intense than others of course, some are more challenging, but you can considerably lessen how stressful they are by thinking about them in different ways. For instance, if you’ve got a lot to get done on a day, re-prioritise. There is usually very little indeed that needs to be done by a certain time; it’s just that we get attached to a plan, or are trying to be efficient, or fit too many things in.

  1. Be willing to act on inspiration. When the muse takes you, even if you can’t do anything about it in that moment, make a note (verbal or written) of something that will remind you of it, so you can come to it later.  The reason this is important is because when you create from an inspired place, it always takes less time. (You can read here http://wildwisdom.co.uk/inspired-action-motivated-action/ more about the difference between inspired action and motivated action).

It takes practice to discover this, but here’s a story to inspire you. I had the idea just recently of creating a gift to give away to readers of my new book. The idea of it popped into my head (Grief Support Statement), I took action immediately and the content just poured out with ease. The whole thing took about half an hour, including formatting it.

  1. Set yourself a time limit and focus on the task for that time only. By doing this you’re creating a container within which your creativity can be safely unleashed. Once you’ve set the time, and are clear what the task is, take a few moments to settle in your chair. Close your eyes; let the edges of your body soften; notice your breathing. Relax. Then start your doing. This is the practical application of my mantra Stop. Be Still. Listen. And Only Then Act. When you do this, you’re opening the channels for flow to happen more easily, and when things are flowing they of course take less time.

If the back to front thinking in this article is proving hard for you to actually put into practice, and if you really WANT to work less, but produce more, then contact me.

August, traditionally a month of holidays, is not a holiday for me. Instead, I’m here to help you. 🙂 Email me with the answer to this question:

What is it about getting work done that is the most challenging for me?

And I’ll contact you to set up a time for a free Wild Wisdom conversation.

How teamwork is the trick to getting things done

I'll do it.‘If I want something done well, it’s best to do it myself.’

‘I’m the best person for the job; trouble is, I’m the best person for every job!’

‘It takes too long to show someone else to do; I might as well do it myself.’

If you’ve ever heard yourself saying any of these, then it may be time to reconsider, as in uttering these words you are guaranteed to be creating a hard time for yourself.  It’s understandable – as a professional, you know your work inside out, and no doubt you are proud of the brilliant service you offer others.

But if you want to include freedom, fun and balance in your life, then you’ll have to rethink these kinds of statements.

I was reminded last night of the power of contribution and community while watching a TV programme. A UK family had travelled from the UK to Chile, and were building their own home in the middle of nowhere, an hour’s drive from the nearest small shop.  They really were doing it all themselves, as well – no building contractors, no plumbers or electricians or carpenters. Just themselves, some books and  – well, yes they did have help, actually. They couldn’t in the end do it all alone.

The help came in the form of neighbours, and cattle. Cattle to drag the trees that had been chopped down to make one of the roofs. A neighbour whose work is felling trees for building; another neighbour who hunts the wild boar to make a living; and a final man who acted as a guide for the visiting TV presenter.

It got me thinking about how easy it is to think, as a solo professional, that you are working alone, and that you are the only one who can do what you do. While that is of course possible, it’s not how the best businesses are built. Those, no matter what size, come about with teamwork – when a team of people get together to create, inspire and implement.

It means you have to be willing to delegate (tasks that others can do); dream (into what you truly want, and then go for that); and reach out for help that you maybe secretly know you need.

I have both my brothers who work for me on the website and other IT needs; my coach, who helps me focus on the next steps; my various Facebook groups who are usually up for giving a bit of advice; and both my mastermind groups, where I can both give and receive help. Plus I have an accountant, who is always available should I need his advice.

I love knowing that someone else is working on my business, at the same time as I am. If you’ve never tried this, I recommend it!

We all, in essence, work better, more satisfyingly and productively when we work together. Plus, it’s much more fun!  Do you have a group of people with whom you work? Who are they, and what do you do for each other?  Share in the comments section and let me know!

If you’d like to discover how having me on your team will help you get clear on where you are going, holding your hand along the way, and supporting you to live your highest life possible, then email me direct and we can explore that in a complimentary Wild Wisdom Session. Reach out, in other words, and ask for help!